After 20 years of marriage Sally Moffit was left penniless by her moron husband when he decided to marry their 19 yr old baby sitter. When faced with entering the dating scene at 45 she decided to marry an actual jack-ass. I recently had the opportunity to sit down with Sally and discuss this controversial decision.
N- "Ms. Moffit, what lead to the idea that a Jack-Ass might be a suitable marriage mate?"
S -"Well, for most of my marriage my husband behaved like one. I had dated quite a bit prior to marriage and pretty much all of them were at least partly idiots. I though maybe times had changed but most of my married girlfriends said there husbands were complete morons most of the time as well. They were all pretty happy but I just didn't want to go that route again."
N - "Interesting. So how did that lead to the idea to marry a jack-ass."
S - "Well my girlfriends and I were having a few drinks at Chili's and this man approached my friend and told her she had a nice rack. We were in the middle of one of our man bashing sessions at the time so he was in real trouble."
N - "I can only imagine"
S - "My friend stood up and asked why men were such idiots. He then answered, if you hate us so much why do you women keep coming after us? He then walked off but it started a conversation joking about how we would be better off without them. Then someone shouted,' their such donkeys we might as well just marry one'. That was when I decided!"
N - "How interesting. And how does the jack-ass compare to your husband?"
S- "Well he's just as cranky when he's tired or hungry. He makes messes and doesn't clean them up and gives a blank stare when I'm talking to him. So their pretty similar."
N - "Any upside?"
S- "Definitely, I can just pour his food into a bowl, he doesn't make me watch sports and when I'm sick of him or he smells I can just lock him outside. I'm not crazy, I don't actually think hes my husband, hes just a pet. I just thought it would be a funny statement to make."
N - "Indeed."
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